How can you adapt strategies for conflict resolution to your own personal life when a problem arises with friends or family?

When a problem arises I can try to use the steps in conflict resolution: define the problem, propose a solution, listen carefully to the other person, agree on shared values, and brainstorm together. We may need to compromise, use arbitration as a solution or a mediator, or agree to disagree.

The first step in resolving conflicts with family and friend is to remain calm. It is impossible to solve a problem when you are nervous and stressed, it only worsens the situation and does not allow you to reason correctly and rationally. Once you have remained calm, you can use some conflict resolution strategies such as:

Recognize that we all have unbiased perceptions of justice: Both parties to a conflict usually think they are right (and the other side is wrong) because they literally cannot get out of our own heads. Our sense of what constitutes fair conflict resolution is influenced by self-centeredness, or the tendency to have difficulty seeing a situation from someone else's point of view. When involved in a conflict, we need to try to overcome our self-centered perceptions of justice. We can do this by jointly hiring a mediator who can help us see each other's point of view, or by recruiting another kind of impartial expert, such as an appraiser, to offer his view of the "facts." Avoid increasing tensions with threats and provocative movements: When we feel that we are being ignored or massacred, we often try to capture the other party's attention by making a threat, such as saying we will take a dispute to court or try to ruin the other party's business reputation. . There is a time and place for litigation, but threats and other attention-grabbing moves such as take or leave offers are often a mistake. Because of the common human tendency to treat others the way they are treated, people tend to respond to threats in kind, leading to spiral escalation and the escalation of conflict. Before you make a threat, make sure you have exhausted all other options for managing conflicts. Separating sacred issues from pseudo-sacred issues: Conflict management can be particularly intractable when core values that negotiators believe to be sacred, or non-negotiable, are involved, such as their family ties, religious beliefs, political views, or personal moral code. We tend to err on the side of not negotiating when sacred principles and values are at stake. Therefore, it is important to thoroughly analyze the benefits you might expect from negotiation that would allow you to honor its principles.