Isolation
Unpredictability
Shame
Control
Explanation:
Controlling behavior is a red flag in any relationship. Examples of controlling behavior include:
making demands or orders and expecting them to be fulfilled
making all decisions, even canceling another’s plans without asking
continually monitoring another person’s whereabouts. Abusive people may try to make a person feel shame for their shortcomings or feel as though they are much worse for these shortcomings.
This takes many forms, including:
Lectures: The abusive person may give lectures about the other person’s behavior, in a way to make it clear that the other person is inferior.
Outbursts: This involves aspects of control, as well. Not doing what an abusive person wants may result in an outburst of angry behavior from them. It is both a way to control the person and make them feel shame for “not listening.”
Lies: Abusive people may blatantly lie, telling the person false opinions from their friends about their “bad” behavior. Abusive people also act in many ways to make the other feel isolated from others, including:Telling another person they cannot spend time with friends or family
hiding the person’s car keys
stealing, hiding, or even destroying the person’s cell phone or computer
Abusive people may seem to make situations chaotic for no other reason than to keep the other in check. Unpredictable behaviors may include:drastic mood swings, such as from being very affectionate to full of rage and breaking things
emotional outbursts
starting arguments for seemingly no reason! There are many signs but her are some of them
