Under what conditions does young twain say he would return to hannibal

On Life on the Mississippi , Chapter 4 Mark Twain says he would return home only after he'd become a pilot, a glorious pilot.

"So by and by I ran away. I said I never would come home again till I was a pilot and could come in glory. But somehow I could not manage it. I went meekly aboard a few of the boats that lay packed together like sardines at the long St. Louis wharf, and very humbly inquired for the pilots, but got only a cold shoulder and short words from mates and clerks. I had to make the best of this sort of treatment for the time being, but I had comforting daydreams of a future when I should be a great and honored pilot, with plenty of money, and could kill some of these mates and clerks and pay for them. "

Explanation:

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