Please help me please this is urgent I'm having trouble This submission should contain:

1. An original version of one of your body paragraphs with the area(s) you plan to revise highlighted.

2. The revision of that paragraph with the revised area(s) highlighted. Remember that the revision must include your combining two sentences from the original paragraph to create a compound-complex sentence that demonstrates syntax variety and maturity. You should also look for and remove any instance of passive voice. If you did not have any passive voice in your original submission, then just note that in your reflection.

3. A reflection explaining the revisions you made and how they strengthen the paragraph.

my original paragraph
Is there any positive affect playing video games? Of course, physiologists use video games to cure children and adults. How? They use games to help them with different types of disorders such as attention-deficit, hyperactivity, and also with brain injuries. In fact, Games help people with cancer to destroy bad cells and protect them. “Some therapists use games to treat people with brain injuries or learning disabilities. One game allows cancer patients to destroy harmful cells and shield themselves from the effects of chemotherapy."

explanation:

the intellectual community is a place like a university where people with high marks, or original thought or an outstanding interest in something gather. they take classes together. they discuss things. they argue sometimes, and not always in a friendly way. but if they argue, it is because they are passionate about something, and there is nothing the matter with that.

lately i've been hearing rumors that it is not the way it was when i went to school. the one thing all schools used to have was free speech. the 1st amendment rights were sacred. now i'm hearing they are not. students can be reported and disciplined for giving an off the wall opinion.

that is shameful.

intellectual ideas are meant to be discussed. they are meant to be chewed up and worked on. that is the primary responsibility of every intellectual community. if that is not the way it is, then that is not a school to go to.

social media, in my opinion, and this is just an opinion. i wouldn't take it too seriously, complicates everything to do with human communication. you can want to share things and others feel they have the right to be very critical or sarcastic or mean about what you share. lack of respect is an immeasurable intolerable condition and social media abounds with that sort of thing.

one of the things i really like about is how careful people are because they must have some idea that the mods are exactly what the word says they are. they police this board very well, and what is so remarkable about them is that they are no older than the average grade 12 student.

my hat goes off to them (which means i respect them quite a bit).

1 click on your profile

2 go to edit profile

3 the last choice is profile picture, click that