Having problems at work or school with key members of the organization, such as owners, CEO, and fellow managers, or teachers.
Explanation:
Something I've learned in my +5 years of formally working as a professional is the brutal reality that things will not always go according to plan or the desired way. There are so many factors that contribute to this. One considerable factor is that we work with other human beings, who bring their own stories and circumstances to the mix. I always go into a new workplace with the best attitude and intention of learning, cooperating, making things happen, meeting awesome people, etc. However, people come with their own ideas of how things should be done and what should be done. Particularly people with higher ranks who lack emotional intelligence to empathize can really screw things up for you and make it rain on your parade. I've come across such brick walls of humans who, in their persistence to do things their way have considerably damaged me. I've felt attacked, I've felt used, I've felt mocked, broken, and disrespected. Here's the thing. It's critical that one doesn't sit comfortably in self-pity when we come across these situations. These moments in time will always come and it's up to us to decide how well we manage them. I'm not embarrassed to admit that the first times I met inflexible emotionally un-intelligent superiors I handled it very poorly. It's great to let yourself feel the anger and frustration. What's not recommended is to allow these intense emotions to guide your actions and dominate your life at work and at home. With the years and accumulated experiences, I've learned to control the situation as much as possible from within. First of all, I always assume that there is some responsibility in me. I know that if I take control of what I can actually change, I can reduce the tense situation if only a little. Another thing to consider is that people always criticise us for "blaming" others, but I've found that for me to openly and acceptingly admit to my own faults and responsibility, it is also very helpful to know where the other person's responsibility starts and ends. It's okay to identify what someone else is doing wrong, so long as one accepts that we can't jump into their brains to fix it ourselves. Next, if I truly run out of things I can take responsibility for in a tense social and work interaction, it's time for me to take control of my emotions. I let them flow through me without letting them speak for me. Something that has worked great for me has been stepping out for 10 minutes to sit down and meditate. I let the air flow in and out, I focus on what my body is doing and feeling from top to bottom, I feel the anger and then a let it go just as smoothly.
I'm using this experience because I am a very emotional person. I have ALL the feelings and they come with fierce determination. So in high school or college or at work, if a teacher or boss has ever done something dishonest, unfair, or downright wrong, it has a huge impact on me. It makes me mad and I have an ever growing need of fighting for what's right and fair. I've had to learn how to channel this anger, which is correct, into something more productive. I've also had to accept that this person of authority will most likely get away with their horrible and selfish decision, but knowing that it's not in my power to punish them or make them learn, makes it much easier to let go and trust that they will eventually have to learn their lesson, and it'll probably be the hard way. Hey, if I've learned so many very tough lessons the VERY hard way, who's to say that they won't too...eventually?
