According to author stephen covey, effective communication is driven by:
"sharing your insights with others to make sure they know the right way to do things"
"getting your point across"
"knowing best how to direct a conversation"
"seeking first to understand, then to be understood"

Seeking first to understand, then to be understood

Explanation:

Seek first to understand, then to be understood is the fifth habit Stephen Covey lists in his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. He believes that to be the key to effective interpersonal communication. According to him, most people first want to be understood; to get their point across. That may lead to ignoring the other person completely, selectively listening while just waiting for a chance to reply, without any intent to truly understand. Before giving our opinion, we should listen carefully and try to understand the other person. As, according to Covey, many people don't have this habit, we can often hear someone (especially the youth) say that no one understands how they feel.