Top 10 reasons why raccooons are the best pets reason 1 : he protec but he also attac reason 2: they can regenerate limbs if you need to whip up a quick dinner you can just chop off a raccoons leg raisin 3: they're obidient. you want someone dead? your raccoon will kill them james bond style no questions asked rehab 4: raccoon p, iss cures cancer reasoon 5: theyre really good at video games. if you s/u/ck /d/i/c/k at csgo, a raccoon will carry your fat as, s no problem reason 6: need protection against someone with a gun? raccoons are naturally bullet proof. end my suffering, put me out of my misery just pull the /f/u/cking trigger (reason 7): raccoons can destroy any animal in a 1v1 put a cat and a raccoon in a boxing ring, that cat'll get rekt reason 888888: b/I/tches see you walking a dog, they ignore your as. s. /b/I/tches seeing you walking a raccoon, youve scored a get out of virgin free card. 99999999999999999999999999: raccoon s/hi/t cures hepatitis and r(pixar lamp)ason 10: just look at them, they're /f/u/cking adorable even if you didnt chop off your dogs vagina this hunk of an animal would still be getting l/a/id 10x more Boom there you go 10 reasons raccoons are the best pets. if youre still not convinced that you need a raccoon in your life then congratulations; youre probably gonna wind up a p/u/s/s/y /a/s/s /bi/t/c/h so do yourself a favor and take a bubble bath with your favorite rubber ducky and a high-voltage toaster to put yourself out of your miser-cut